panu na nga ba ulet maging single? naku, nakalimutan ko na...

...panu na nga ba ulet maging single? naku.. nakalimutan ko na. Yung walang ka ng aabangang mga texts, walang mga "I love You" sa umaga, walang pagsusmbungan kapag malungkot ka. Wala ng mga surprise dates, wala ng kilitian, wala ng PDA. Ganun. Pero less pa yan ng mga bagay na tunay na mami-miss ko kapag single na ko ulet. wala ng mga yakap; wala ng mga halik; at wala ng feeling ng security na kahit anu pang mess at pagkakalat ang gawin mo sa buhay, may isang tao pa ring magmamahal sau. Wala ng magsasabing "ikaw na lang ang nagpapasaya sa akin", "para sa future ito", "may sasabihin ako sau, love kita!! wala lang!"... ang lungkot noh?

iniisip ko na lang, masaya naman ang naging relationship namin. alam kong minahal nya talaga ako at madami syang ginawa na talagang hindi na mawawala sa puso ko. kaso lang, ang msamang balita ay, nanlalamig na sya eh. yung tipong, nagde-depreciate na ang love nya. alam mo ba, nung unang nangyari saking iniwan ako, ganito rin ang case. nanlalamig, pero ayaw makipag break. so that time, ako ang nakipag break. kasi nga hindi na ako mahal di ba? pero nung pa't nagtanong-tanong na ang mga tao sa sudden breakup namin, naka- nang- putcha, pinalabas nya sa mga tao na ako naman daw ang nakipag hiwalay. so, well ang tingin ng mga tao, ako ang masama. ako daw kasi ang nawalan ng pag-asa. kaya alam mo ba, sa relasyon ko ngayon sa bf ko na to (yung subsequent sa na-mention kong bastard), talagang i did the best that i can to save what we have. kasi nga, baka naman pagtitiis ang gusto ni God na ma-test sa pagkatao ko. Okay naman si current BF eh. mapagmahal, responsable at resourceful sa buhay. Kung baga, kung sino man ang mapapangasawa nito, tiyak, buhay na. Kaso nga lang, ganun eh. Mukhang hiindi na ata ako mahal. Malaking problema yun di ba? Yun ung tipong kahit ano atang save mo, eh wala na sayo ang bola eh. Hindi na ako ang may problema. Sya na. Kaya kahit siguro maglabasan na ang mga litid ko sa kaka-explain at kakatanong kung ano ang pwede kong gawin para bumalik sya sakin.. ay wala rin syang maisasagot. At least, tuwing nalulungkot ako, naaalala ko na lang ang past ko before i met him...

sige, kwento ko sau... alam mo, when my ex and i broke up,, i was so devastated. galit na galit ako. as in kung pede ko lang durugin ang heart ko para hindi na sya magmahal ulet. plus, ito pa, galit na galit din ako sa self ko. kasi, parang alam mo yon, ang dali nyang maka-move on tapos ako hindi. Then, alam mo, sbi ng best friend ko sakin.. " God cant mend a broken heart, if you dont give him all the pieces".. so i was stunned. Di ba nga totoo. That's what i did. Time passed i prayed every night for peace and forgiveness, and miraculously, i felt better. Im not bitter anymore, and i learned not to care about my ex. Yun tipong, clean slate. It took me around four months to do this. we broke up July 9, 2004, so mga November, i was a free spirited na. Masaya na ko in my own ways as a single, unattached person, and i met new people. And i mean new people,kasi that's when i met my current BF. I fell in love with him, gradually. Kc nga, i dont trust my heart any more that time, kaya ang dami kong doubts non. pero alam mo, i prayed ulet everynight, AT WELL.. KINAIN KO RIN ANG SINABI KO. Sabi ko kc sa sarili ko, hindi na ako ulet magmamahal. pero one night, i made a confession to myself na, kahit anong control pa, you can nevr stop your heart from beating again. so i gave our relationship a shot. That's around April 2005. It was never an easy journey for us.. pero one thing is for sure. Nakapag mahal ako ulet. God made it happen, nagtiwala lang ako sa kanya. and he freed me. yun ang nangyari before. So thats possible ulet di ba?

Ang buong tiwala ko, as in kay God ko na binibigay. My relationship with my current bf ay talagang reaching for its recession. ewan ko ba, iniisip ko, bakit ba sa tuwing nagmamahal ako, ako naman, ang naiiwan. Pero wala naman akong magagawa don di ba? Will ni God yun eh. Saka in the first place, sya rin naman ang nagbigay kay current bf di ba? I was in pain; even worse than the wilderness when i found the love of my life. My current BF talaga ang mahal na mahal ko. Kaya nga nalulungkot ako eh. kasi baka naman, naisip ni God, tapos na ang time na allotted for the two of us. Its time for us to move on alone na. Isipin mo, nung kaka-break ko lang kay EX, may mga moments na namimiss ko yung feeling ng may nagmamahal sakin. Tapos dumating si Current BF. Wala akong reason para magtampo kay God; kasi nga, i know deep down sa puso ko, naramdaman ko naman un. walang rason para maging bitter ako. Malungkot nga lang, nakakapanibago, at talagang masakit. pero nga, tulad ng sinabi ko kay current bf, wala namang hindi nahi-heal ang time. Tested ko na yun.

isa lang ang takot eh. yun bang AUTOMATIC na maghold on ang puso ko sa kanya. alam mo na. yung tipong, hindi sya maalis. pero sabi nga ni Joe d mango, mas masasaktan ako kung pipilitin ko syang alisin sa puso ko. bayaan mo lang yung. it will eventually die a natural death. yung starvation in human terms. mahal na mahal ko kc talaga sya. at hinihiling ko na nga lang, na si God na ang mag bigay sakin ng peace of mind at sana i-heal na nya ang heart ko.

The Hard Lessons on Love and Men (From Grey's Anatomy)

Well i know i'm not supposed to post this since, i planned to post only original compositions, but what the hell!! i like this, and i feel this would really be a big help to every woman who deserves such an unfailing and unconditional love. i dont believe that all men are dogs though.. but lets admit it... angels aside, there are really those that would require a miracle before they realize a woman's value.

thanks to my friend, Henierose Baldonado for sharing this very inspiring and convincing message. i hope this would enlighten the women, and MEN to be more considerate and loving to each other.

1. A man won't let go if he really loves you.Do not hold on to someone who has let go of you. He does not love you and does not value having you.Believe me, he will not let go if he really loves you. There is another reason he is not willing to tell.

2. Do not look for reasons why he ended the relationship.There is only one reason why he ended your relationship. He just does not love you.Do not waste your time thinking of reasons or what you should have done. Move on and be open to a man who will truly love you.

3. Do not get hung up on your past.Do not nag or distrust your current boyfriend just because your ex hurt you.Do not treat him or the relationship the same way. Do not compare.He will not react the same way as your ex. Do not be worried that your simple mistakes will cause him to look for another girl.What happened with your ex was not your fault. It was not because you didn't guard him enough or you didn't make him happy enough.

4. Do not look into images.How many times have you met a girl who didn't have the best image in school or at the office, but you get to know the girl and found out she was actually extremely nice?Do not rely on images. Oftentimes, it is far from reality.Do not fear men just because your "supposedly" perfect ex-boyfriend mistreated you.

5. Always have your own set of rules.Set your limits on how far you'd go for a guy. It's perfectly ok to give and do everything as long as it's worth it..And it's worth it if the guy is treating you right.

6. Do not be scared to lose him. Don't be scared that he'll break up with you.Once you are afraid of losing him, you easily can be taken advantage.Be strong and if something is unacceptable, do not accept it and speak up.

7. Avoid calling your guy.It's a guy thing. The relationship will definitely be better if it's the guy who's calling, not the girl.He will get tired of you if you keep on calling. He will lose interest and challenge.More so, he will get annoyed. But it's a girl thing also that your fingers get too itchy until you dial his number.But avoid as much as possible. Call only if really needed (like checking if your suspicions are reasonable).

8. There is a guy who will value you.There is a guy out there who can make you feel valued, appreciated,and loved. And I mean, not just during your first few weeks together. So don't lose hope.Don't settle for a lesbian if you are not attracted to women.There is a man out there who can love you like a girl can.Also, do not believe him when he says it's just the way he really is.He's not the sweet or expressive-type. Remember during your first few weeks together?Where has that sweet guy gone? He simply is not that into you anymore.

9. Always be the only one, no matter what.Do not ever fall for a guy who has another girl, be it his wife,girlfriend, or any girl that he says he just can't get rid of for whatever reason. If you truly believe that he loves you and for some reason, he can't leave or let go of another girl, then you are no different from any ordinary mistress.

10. He must respect you.No matter how long the relationship has been, he should always show respect towards you.

11. If he fooled you, end it.Philandering once is enough.You can never trust nor respect the person again.

12. Never start a relationship the wrong way.Do not steal another girl's man, for whatever reason. Nor should you enter a relationship for the wrong reasons (loneliness, on therebound, getting back at your ex, man-dependency, etc.) it is bound not to last. You will only end up wasting more years of your life.

13. Do not force yourself into a relationship. Do not get into a relationship just because your friends are getting impatient with your dating escapades and the one hasn't come yet..Do not choose who to say yes to based on superficial things like money, looks, cars, etc..If you are even thinking of these things, you have not fallen in love yet.

14. Do not settle. If you are not happy anymore with your relationship, break up instantly. He will not stay with you forever no matter how upright he might seem to be.Eventually, he will also want love and happiness in his life.

15. A relationship has to have love. Love is the only thing that will push you to give your efforts into making the relationship work. And believe me, keeping a relationship requires genuine efforts of both parties.

16. Don't be afraid to be single.It's fun to be single, try it. You can go out whenever and wherever you want. You are free. You can date whomever you want and you get to go out for free! Do not get a boyfriend just for the sake of having one. Do not settle.

17. Be a good girl. Be a good girl to attract a good guy. Enter the relationship with sincere intentions. Take the guy and the relationship seriously with the plan of spending the rest of your life with that person (of course, this is after you had your bit of fun in your younger years) . If you compare yourflings from your real relationships, you will know that the latter makes you happier and more fulfilled.

18. Love without limits. Whether you loved and gave everything or loved but held out for somethings, if the relationship ends, you still get hurt. But if you gave your everything, you were happy and you could say that it was worth it. If you didn't give your all, you get hurt for nothing.

19. You will get over him. Love is over-stated. Love eventually ends and you are free to love another.

20. Be the one. Act like you are the one. Don't be a nagger. Don't hinder his gimmicks. Don't give in to him too easily.Make him treat you as important. Don't be easy. Don't be like every other girl he had in his life.